[0:00] Greetings, everyone, and thank you again for tuning in to the Inspirational Soul podcast. It has been an absolute whirlwind of energy of late, and when I'm talking about this and at the time of this recording.
[0:22] Specifically talking about the period of the changeover of 25 into 26 there is so much that has been going on so much that is happening so much that is being built and happening in the background which is absolutely amazing and even this is literally the real first podcast episode for the year which is absolutely exciting and i love it because it really does usher in, Everything that is now really becoming massively very clear and dear to my heart.
[1:08] It's a combination of all the experience, all the understandings, like so much information and observations that I have made through all the wonderful connections with people, whether it's in person, one-on-one, through the groups, through the stage shows, all of these things. And I'm bringing all of this together and I cannot wait to share with you what has been happening. This episode is also fresh off the inaugural Inspirational Soul Summit. We literally had that over the weekend just past where I was joined by the lovely and soul brethren of mine, Nick Dimos and Daniel Douglas Hunt from North America. We had an amazing two days with absolute soul-filled inspiration and transformation. So I cannot thank all the attendees for that enough to come along and share in that. It was absolutely magic.
[2:10] And this episode specifically does come along and branches off of what I was talking about. Coming in a little bit just after the Christmas and really does tag on the end. Of the summit and everything about it. Now, don't stress if you're listening and going, well, hey, Pete, I wasn't there. Don't worry about that. It's just leading you into it because what it did do is the summit and the conversations, the talking.
[2:43] Everything that happened there just reaffirmed that, hey, this is the path, this is what I need to be talking about, and this is why we're here. So, this episode is not so much about like being, hey, it's a new year and it's a new energy kind of thing. I want you to have a look at this and moving in and forward. And you might be listening to this episode at any point, and it doesn't have to be at the beginning of a new year. Whenever you are listening this to this episode you are listening to this episode for a very very specific reason you have found your way here to listen to this for the reason of something inside of you is looking for a change and it may not be a change that you're looking to to fix to solve or to manage. It's just kind of going, you're needing and requiring understanding for yourself and about yourself. And this is not just something that gets computed in your mind or your head. This is something that happens in the deeper part of yourself. So, if you've reached this and you've come to this episode, you're not looking for a new version of yourself.
[4:00] I want you to look at this as you're looking for new honesty with yourself. And this is a huge, huge thing because there's one thing I want you to remember here, right here, right now, even before we go any further. Remember this, energy never lies. Yep, remember that phrase because once you hone in on that and you honor that phrase, you are going to have such a very deep, real, and authentic honesty with yourself that once you really do honor and latch onto, you will never be able to forget. Because here's the thing, right? As we move things or as life happens, sometimes we might have a bit of a jump in our motivation. It's like, oh, I'm going to do this and I'm going to make this change. But let's face it, that motivation, it will drop. It kind of just vanishes after a while.
[5:06] Sometimes you tell yourself, I've got to push through this. I've got to do this. So guess what? But we tap into that willpower of ours and hoping that it will be strong enough and resilient enough to go the distance to create the change that we're looking for permanently. But let's be real, the willpower also fades over time. And of course, just like motivation, once it drops or fades, we go, I still haven't required or found that change that I'm looking for.
[5:40] You can have the absolute best of intentions moving forward about your situation or about how you wish to shift, but even those will fall flat on you.
[5:53] Because those things that we rely on so much they exist in a different part of ourselves they exist in the upper part the mind the head they exist there where we feel like we need to actively push and work our way through or survive these particular things But whereas at the end of the day The energy will always tell you the truth The energy is always there Speaking to you.
[6:27] And it will always remind you of what you are really feeling, what you are really wanting, and how you really wish to go about the shift and the change that you're seeking in your life. Because, you know, let's just give the example here. You know, how many times, this is something I genuinely do feel that most of us have experienced in our life. You know you've walked into a room or a party and you know when you're greeted at the door and you kind of see what's happening and you you immediately look around going i'm not even sure what i'm doing here but you go anyway then you finally arrive and you knock on the door and the host opens the door and they're like oh hey welcome oh it's so great you could come all you know the pleasantries and you go, yeah, hey, oh, great. Oh, thank you so much for the invite. Oh, my, yeah, it looks exciting. Wow, it looks like it's really happening. But realistically, underneath it all, you're there going, oh, my God, what is happening here? Like, this place is dead. Why did I even come? Oh, my God, I knew I didn't want to come to this, but I said yes anyway. way.
[7:44] We've all kind of had a situational scenario very similar to that. So, the whole point around that scenario is, and we've all experienced it, whether you're the person rocking up on the door or maybe you were the host and you felt it from a guest that was arriving, it doesn't matter. There is a very similar situation we've all experienced. And the thing here is you can fake your enthusiasm, but you can never fake how you feel. And that's where the energy never lies. And you've got to remember that. So, that's why it's really, really key to listen to there as well. So, As we jump into this, this is going to be like a really amazing insight. I'm going to go through some of the core elements. But before I jump into those, I want you to like have a look at this and let's have a look at the concept of energetic leaks. Like this is in terms of general life because at the end of the day, and this is working from the premise, which I'd like to think if you're listening
[8:54] to this, you would agree with is that we are all energy. And when we're looking at this, we're not looking at this from a mental perspective. We're not looking at this from a physical perspective. We're looking at this from an energetic and an energetic intelligence perspective.
[9:12] So, when we're talking about an energetic leak, this means somehow and somewhere in our life, we're bleeding energy. No different to if you were going to cut yourself and blood was going to come out. The only difference is with the energy and the energetic body, this does happen, but so many of us are not aware that it's happening or we're actually leaking energy. Therefore, I just want to break it down and help you to understand what exactly an energetic leak is. It's quite simple. It's not as fancy or as woo-woo as you'd think it is. But all an energetic leak is, is simply energy leaving you and your body faster than it's being replenished.
[10:04] So, that's why sometimes quite often I'll refer to us as being like a battery or, you know, battery. Sorry, I've been hanging out with my North American comrades for chill on their battery. That's very Canadian. Thanks, Dania. If you're listening. Yeah. But yeah, so it's like with the battery and if it gets too low and we don't replenish it, we can't work as much. We're not as effective. You know, we don't have as much energy. We fade faster. Like instead of lasting to mid-afternoon, you're like, oh my God, I need three cups of coffee before midday. You know, you feel that on a physical sense.
[10:38] So when the energy is leaving you faster than it's being replenished, it's your body starts to talk to you and your body just starts saying things like no you know so it'd be how you might find it's that you're always the one you know needing to be there for everyone else except for you you might be finding that you're carrying a lot of emotional weight a lot of emotional baggage that is not yours and maybe it never was. You're trying to reach or stay in an aligned state in situations, but now you're forcing it beyond its aligned state. Therefore, you're staying in a situation trying to push and hold it for too long when it's already passed.
[11:37] This is something that I have really noticed over these years. These patterns don't just live in the mind. They live in our body. And what's really interesting, and this is something that's going to be occurring, is we're going to be looking at this in a deeper way moving forward. So, this is really like an intro episode into a deeper dive. But here in this episode, I just want to introduce these to you. And that's a big part of it. And when we do, when we're going to jump into this, we're going to have a look at how it really is showing up for us, in our body and our energetic body.
[12:20] So, it's okay, but let's jump in and let's have a look at the three big energetic leak patterns that I tend to see, and these are ones that we can also identify. So, energetic leak number one. Right? This is the over-giver leak. Pretty straightforward. It says it itself. And I can guarantee you actually all three of these I have absolutely fallen into and I'm guilty of myself. So that's why I can say these with 100% certainty because I have experienced every single one. But the first one is the over-giver leak. So if you're not sure, the over-giver is the type of person who is always kind of switched on and you're trying to anticipate other people's needs first.
[13:18] Because of that, you may find yourself stepping in on situations before it happens because you're trying to stay on top of it. You may even find a subtlety in conversations. And what I mean by that is that you could very will be just listening, sitting down, having coffee, maybe over dinner, whatever. And you're listening to someone, but you're also jumping in to finish their conversation, their topic, because you're trying to anticipate what they're trying to say or get to. And if you're doing that, or maybe it's the other way around, maybe you're noticing someone close to you doing that, That lets you know they're in anticipation mode, not to shut you down, not to like say that you're not thinking fast enough, but believe it or not, they're overgiving. They're trying to fill these gaps without being asked because they're being energetically generous.
[14:30] So, I love this because even as I'm talking you through this, you know, you've got to really start looking at this from both sides. You might go, wow, yes, I have experienced this, but it's also important to go, oh, wow. When have I done this? And that way you'll start to see because quite often or not, when you're doing this, when you're being energetically generous, the over-giver, it often comes from a deeper pattern of if I don't give, if I don't show you how much I am willing to show up for you, I may not belong or the person who I'm trying to help may no longer like me, need me, that kind of rhetoric. So, it's a very, very important one. And as you can see, if that pattern is a very deep one, it can be very hard to budge. And when you start to try to shift it, it can be a little bit jarring because you're kind of pushing yourself out of it.
[15:45] So what this really means, so this is a big thing. This leak doesn't mean you stop being kind, okay? Like it doesn't say, pull back, everyone, take care of yourself, we're done. Like done with overgiving and screw you all and I'm going to go lay on the beach and recharge and replenish my batteries. No, it doesn't mean stop being kind. All it's asking you is to pause. That's it. Pause. Pause before you interject.
[16:17] Pause before you want to jump in and fix or solve or manage. It's like just pause before you want to reach out. And that's the best way I like to visualize this. It's like you're listening and it's like you're ready to reach out and lend a hand in a microsecond. That's that anticipation. Another great way of looking at that or a metaphor is, you know, and I'm not calling anybody out here or shaming anyone, but that beautiful term sometimes, which we see, is you can have be the helicopter parent. It's like they're always hovering. That's the anticipation. It doesn't mean it's a bad thing, but it's just like it's where their mode is like, I've got to jump in. I have to anticipate. So, so many of us are doing this, not even in the parent mode. We're doing this in our everyday life and if you're finding that you're looking to make sure everything's okay before anything happens you might very well be in that over giver space and you could be leaking energy here right so what happens is this has become an embodied pattern and it's when giving becomes automatic this is what i mean so you might be looking at is go, I know someone like this, that's okay. You've got to understand it's probably automatic for them now. And when it becomes automatic...
[17:42] This is when it stops being nourishing. This is when it stops being like a little bit more on the compassionate side. It's just it becomes stepping in. And this is when we can also start to feel friction in the energetic exchange when someone's doing that with us. So, it's really important. It's not necessarily fault, but it's like we've got to become aware of it. This is a huge thing. everything here in these three big core elements. I'm just trying to make you aware. That's the key here. We're not fixing. We don't want to solve. We're not trying to manage it. I'm not trying to change you. I'm looking at this purely from possibly you are leaking energy because of this automatic behavior where if you just pause, hold space, let the person finish or let them do their own action without needing to jump in or reach over and help in an instant, you will start to come and give from a far more caring perspective. So, a great way that I've learned to describe this is that if you're falling into this or this is resonating for you, maybe it's someone else that you know, but just remember, you know, we all need that nice, healthy, energetic boundary.
[19:09] Don't become or, you know, you're not here to be an energetic Uber Eats for the world. And this is what tends to happen the pattern starts to form and then other people around you will actually also start to go i know that oh they're going to help me so you become the uber eats they're going to press that button say come and deliver i need some of your energy i need you to help me and all of a sudden guess what you're on call that is not the desirable outcome here All right. So that's the first one. That's the over giver. And that's where sometimes we can very subtly and automatically without our awareness start leaking energy. So that's the over giver energetic leak.
[19:58] Number two, the boundary blur leak. Oh, yes. Yes, the boundary blur lick. I'm just wondering how many of you just hearing that word boundary made you start to brace yourself or maybe go, oh, my God, I do not want to finish listening to this. Or pay attention to how you felt. What did you feel in your body straight away? Okay. When that word popped up. So, remember, the energy never lies. Did you feel heavy? Did you get a knot in your stomach? Did your stomach drop? Did your whole body start to brace? These are all big energetic signals that something is going on here. But the boundary blur is, leak or the energetic leak here is another very big pattern okay boundaries are huge i feel like it's something that we're kind of lacking to acknowledge and work with but it's it's happening.
[21:05] Now what's also abundantly clear here in terms of energetics i'm not asking you to like really just go forward and say this is my boundary i've had enough you know if you're at that point we're not talking about an energetic leak. That's a totally different scenario, but we're not looking at the harsh boundaries. We're looking at the ones where they're blurring, where it's become fuzzy. This is where you start questioning yourself. There's a difference. When you're really wanting to put a hard one in, that's a different level. We're trying to catch this or become aware of this before it gets to that point. So, these are the fuzzy ones. This is where the whole thing of like, you might be in a situation, it could be work or it could be family, personal, and you've just, something's happened and you kind of just look at yourself going, I'm really not happy with that or something about the way that happened or the way we talked about it, it just didn't feel right. That's the fuzziness. That's the blur that I'm talking about. That feeling, that kind of uncomfortableness, that's a boundary blur.
[22:14] Now, what's really important. When you find this, it's not showing or telling you that you don't have the strength for boundaries. Absolutely not. This is just telling yourself that you're needing to listen to your feedback, your own personal feedback more, and you also need to give yourself the permission.
[22:36] To put a healthier boundary in place. Now, I'm going to go a little bit deeper here, just a little bit, not too much. But this permission word is huge, huge on the boundary element.
[22:52] When we're talking about permission and boundaries, this is where you have to give yourself permission. So, listen up. If this is for you, listen up. This is important. When you go into this and you need to unblur this, you need to give yourself the permission to disappoint, to disappoint someone, to let someone down. It's going to happen because that's what boundaries do. But without that communication, be careful. You can quickly slip into becoming the over-giver, right? So give yourself the permission to disappoint. And you're not doing it because you want to hurt them. You're doing it because you're honoring yourself. You're being honest with yourself.
[23:36] You know, also give yourself the permission for the other person to change their mind. Because once you finally communicate what you're really feeling, that is felt. That is not just words. That is felt to the other person or people involved. And because now you're being honest with yourself, they have to get honest with themselves and that might mean they change their mind. So give yourself permission to allow them to do that. And that may also mean that there could be the essence of needing to pull back or change the situation completely. Now, the other permission here is it's also important that you give permission for yourself to say, this no longer works for me.
[24:26] Yeah, let that one. Sit for a moment. Give yourself the permission to say, this no longer works for me. Now, that last permission doesn't mean you have to communicate that to the world or the situation involved. That one there is permission for you to be honest with yourself. Remember what I said at the beginning, the energy never lies. And if you can give yourself that permission and to say that to yourself, you are being energetically honest with yourself and that is fucking powerful.
[25:09] There's a couple of things there. The energy leak happens with the boundaries is because you keep negotiating with yourself after you've made the decision and the decisions are very clear with you in your mind and your body. You're very clear in yourself, but then you just doubt yourself and then you go over and then you negotiate or you justify, you placate. When you have those feelings, that's you then blurring the boundaries yourself. This is why I said at the beginning, needing to be honest with yourself and those permissions...
[25:49] Are so, so important. Now, just take a moment and reflect. Possibly, where have you been feeling those moments of, this no longer works for me? Where can you give yourself permission to feel and be honest with yourself a little bit more? Where do you need to give permission for others and give them the space to create the change? Because as soon as you get to this level, everything starts to lift now i'm not going to say there's no hurt or there's no pain but i tell you what as soon as you go through that hurt and pain right there it will really lift and you are going to feel so much like lighter clearer and happier within yourself, when you really honor that so the boundary blur leak is huge it is a powerful one so please remember that. Okay. And number three, if we thought the boundary one was big, poof, wait for you, this one.
[26:52] So, number three, the responsibility that isn't yours leak.
[27:00] Okay, maybe I could come up with a better title than that, but I think you'll get where I'm coming from. But it's the responsibility leak. And when I'm talking about the responsibility, it's you taking on the responsibilities that are not yours. This one is huge. This happens all the time. And I tend to find anyone who's a little bit more on the spiritual curious side, the energetic side has a bit of a calling.
[27:25] This is huge around anybody who's got a bit more of a calling to this line of work. I tend to find it's more around teachers, nurses, aged care, paramedics, anyone who's a genuine kind of giver and helper in some shape or form, the responsibility leak really does come into play so it's really interesting we take this on and like i said i'm super guilty of this and i've learned lessons around all three but this one is big because responsibility sometimes you know feels like it's almost like your spiritual job description like you know i'm here as this soul and i need to be responsible for so many people we can do that and yeah i've done that so yeah guilty is charged um so i'm right there with you if you're feeling this one but anyone who falls into this category if you're feeling like you are taking on a lot of people's responsibility don't be surprised you're gonna feel things deeply deeper than most right because you're a real real carer okay you will also notice the shifts and changes within the people and situations around you much faster than other people.
[28:45] If you're finding yourselves resonating with what i've been saying then you will also find that you are the one who will step in to make sure that the room stays even keel let's let's keep everything peaceful let's not you know rock the boat so to speak you will do this in families you'll do this in workplaces, you can see and feel the situation happening on a much deeper level. And therefore, it's like you become that energetic diplomat. You kind of go in there and you want to make sure everything's balanced and keep everything going. So, like I said, it's a bit of a spiritual job description. You become the energetic peacekeeper, so to speak.
[29:34] But here's where the leak comes in. So, I'm not saying don't do this. Of course, we need people like you. I'm one of them. I'd like to think I'm needed at some point. But you know what I mean? It's this whole thing of it's not about needing to change it or stop doing it. But we've got to understand that this is causing a leak. This is draining you. If you're doing too much of this on a too regular basis, you will absolutely give your energy away and it doesn't matter what you do, you have to replenish. Why do you think it happens all the time when so many people do this and all of a sudden they have a week holiday, but it's only by the time you finish your week holiday and come home, you feel refreshed only to not have the time or space to enjoy that refreshed state. You just jump straight back into doing it again. So it's a deeper one. So, how do we stop the leak if you are the responsible one? Okay. Here's a couple of key things. You can feel without fixing. Yes.
[30:40] You can feel without fixing. This means you can honor yourself. You can honor the room. You can honor the people. You can honor the situation. But it doesn't mean you need to step in. it doesn't mean it's your job to fix it. You can sense it without saving, right? We like to make sure everyone's okay. We just have this natural bone in our body that makes us do that. But sometimes by saving the person or saving the situation on a constant basis is robbing the people involved of their own growth. And not only is it robbing them of their own growth, it's robbing you of your energy. Because once you start to do it, you're going to be constantly aware of it and then they're going to be on your mind. You want to check in with them. All beautiful notions. But when is enough enough? All right? What's important is you've got to start to identify when does the responsibility become identity.
[31:56] Oh, yes. There's another one. When responsibility becomes your identity, your energy drains faster. Quite often, we start off with the best intentions, but then unfortunately, we get molded into that role and it becomes part of our identity. The people around us start to see us as that person, so they lean on us more and more and more. And again, if we don't say anything, the energy will be taken, taken, taken, and taken. For some of you you might be familiar like if you're not careful some people around you may very well become like constant energetic vampires so they just drain now they're not doing it on purpose it's just through automatic that's where the boundary blur happens as well so that's an important one it's not saying that other people are at fault the only person that you control is yourself, so it's important for you to identify this.
[32:59] So, what's really important is when it comes to being the responsible one, you are allowed to be aware of the situation. But you don't have to take charge. You don't have to fix it. You can see it, be aware of it. So, you'll see things, but it's very important. Again, it's just like taking pause, but it's also making you aware that you don't have to rescue it, save it, fix it, solve it, or manage it. That is not always your role very very important okay so that's the responsibility that's not yours leak but a shortened version the responsibility leak it is a big one there's a huge one and it's just something to take in now i cannot stress enough this is not saying it's not here to shame you. It's not here to embarrass you. This is all about awareness. That awareness helps you to see yourself in any of these situations. So, out of these three particular leaks, if you can identify it, the idea is to become aware.
[34:10] Just pause, have that awareness and make sure when you do these things, you're doing it where it won't drain you, where it doesn't become automatic. I just need to make that abundantly clear. I'm not saying don't stop, but it's just don't let it become automatic and don't let these particular traits become part of your identity. When they do, that's when massive energetic leaks start to happen.
[34:43] Now it's also important because if you're falling into this and you're seeing these remember like they haven't formed randomly these are patterns that have become engraved for whatever reason the common reasons that you might be finding that you're having these energetic leaks is because they have made you feel safe and they've been keeping you safe in whatever shape or form they have been keeping you like feeling loved and it feels like people around you need you this is truth like i've fallen into this i'm i'm speaking from my own true experience here, you will feel like you know you have the responsibility to keep things calm it's like and if you don't you know the whole dynamic's gonna blow up right so it's just important to remember that if you recognize yourself here in any of those three, there is nothing wrong with you. Okay. I cannot stress that enough, but we can start to bring and call that energy back to you. We're going to now be aware of this automatic pilot running in the background.
[35:56] And now we can catch it and stop it from letting it all go, okay? So, it's really important. The energy never lies, but please remember the energy that you're also sensing and feeling is never to shame you. All it's trying to do is talk to you and be honest with you. And it's trying to lead you to the best possible version of yourself.
[36:29] So, those are the three core energetic leak patterns that I have seen. And I wanted to share them with you. And I wanted to introduce you to, you know, the idea of energetic leaks because they do happen. And what's the best part is, is that this is part one of a short series on these energetic leaks. And the connection they have and about how to come back to yourself. That's what this is about. And so this is part one of a short series we're going to be going through and they're going to be a deeper dive. And the best part is it's also going to be a bit of fun as we proceed through this mini series. But if there's something here, that has resonated with you already. If it's just clicked, that's what we're looking for. We're not looking to change it here. This is just about awareness. And if awareness has happened here for you, I encourage you to write it down. I encourage you to possibly just have a little bit of a journal, even just grab a piece or a notepad and just write a couple of notes down, just to help you process this energy.
[37:37] And even better, if you're listening to this and you can recognize someone else in this and where you can see where this might help them, please feel free to share this with them. But here's the thing, if you do, don't give it away and say, for example, oh, hey, Steve, I really think that you're the responsibility leak problem here. You should listen to this. That's going to put them in a very state of like, what are you talking about? Like it makes you sound like there's something wrong with me. So if there's something here that you feel like one of your, you know, friends or family could use just to help understand and help claw some of that energy back for them, just send this to them, share this with them and say, hey. I was listening to this and I thought of you, I thought this might help you. Take a listen when you get the chance and when you're finished, let me know and we can have a chat.
[38:38] That will help them to be able to listen to this in their own way, to remain open and that way they can absorb this for themselves in their own way and in their own time. But cannot wait to share and go deeper with you with all of these. We've got another few episodes to come. It's going to be a little bit of fun. And the other thing too is we're going to see how it really relates to our bodies as well. It's going to be a very real and embodied experience as we go through it. And of course, as always, if there's something here that you've liked or you have identified something for yourself, please feel free. Message me. If you've got a further follow-up question, you can put it on Spotify. Send us an email. Put us in a DM. Again, please feel free to reach out because we're in this journey together. And remember, the energy never lies. Look forward to seeing you in the next part of this little mini-series.
